What has happened to the boiler room banter?

We miss it !

End of and era

I'm not really sure what word to use: lonely or empty or cool or sad or vacation...

Today is the last day of the boiler-room-cum-sweat-shop for the summer. Alas, only one lackey is still in the room, which is quite sad after seeing the room start as a packed mad-house holding 8 interns. The advantage, of course, is that not only can I spread my stuff out all over the desk, not only is the temperature of the room 10 degrees lower than last week, but I have no need for polite office formalisms such as clothes and good language.

So here I am, cussing like a sailer and sitting in my skivies, finshing out the job that we all started. I'd like to say that we accomplished a lot, but I would want to give the MAN the satisfaction of thinking that we were tamed into doing his dirty work. maybe I have that backwards... maybe this whole summer was about fighting against the MAN and accomplishing a lot would actually be a huge blow to the MAN's enormous ego.

I'll let you, the reader, decide what happened this summer.

it's hot outside too

In a fit of empathy with the boiler room, the entire east coast (dare I
say the entire country) has decided to get really really really freaking
hot. I would have preferred the opposite - that the boiler room got
cooler to match the rest of the world, but beggers can't be choosers.

Quote of the day

“I can’t BELIEVE she made fun of my cantalopes.” – Sad and outraged anonymous intern

I don't miss you either

No, really, I don't. There are ponies here... and giraffes.

Our new intern

poooooool paaaaaarty!

We're heading out to the pool today to cool down a little bit.

Most of the office is betting that Mike is going to win the water slide
contest, and they are probably right.

I'd love to see a panda

Things in the boiler room are HOT, and I mean hot. Forecast for today: 99 degrees, and 0% humility. That's right. But every now and then I get to break free from this dungeon of a sweat shop. Yesterday Timmy took us to see the dinosaurs! And next week he is taking us to see the ponies!

What's next? I'd love to see a panda. I hear they aren't paid overtime.

it's hot outside too

In a fit of empathy with the boiler room, the entire east coast (dare I say the entire country) has decided to get really really really freaking hot. I would have preferred the opposite - that the boiler room got cooler to match the rest of the world, but beggers can't be choosers.

ho-hum

So, Nashville's sort of bored. They guy that used to sit in the cubicle next to me left to do Border Patrol (Natl. Guard), and there's nothing in court for me to watch today.

Did you all get the classes that you wanted? Or do you know yet? Any other interesting tidbits - anything at all????

New Boiler Room Mascot

The Boiler Room ladies want this man to be our boyfriend.

Kovach. It rhymes with watch.

guess we won't be blogging during class ...

Paragraph from article in the June 26
National Law Journal:

Many institutions, including the University of Michigan Law School and the
University of Virginia School of Law, have implemented mechanisms to limit
Internet access in their classes. This is accomplished by either setting up
wireless Internet blockers, allowing professors to regulate it via hardware
or software installed in the classrooms, or by software installed on the
wireless network that knows when a student is in class, and regulates
appropriately.

Here's the story:
http://www.law.com/jsp/nlj/PubArticleNLJ.jsp?id=1150880719004

chair found!

My chair was found in the office of a co-worker who is to remain
anonymous. This worker denies having responsibility for taking my
chair, but I have other ideas... but I won't press them. All I can say
is that I'm elated to be back sitting in "Old Glory," the chair of
chairs. Watch all of the other interns eat my dust as my productivity
rises while my backside relaxes.

After that last post, it's a good thing there weren't any of these around:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fainting_goats

where the hell is my chair!

The one thing that made the boiler room bearable was my chair! And now
it is gone! Where oh where can my chair be?

Who wrote that last post?

I don't remember working with anyone who may have moved to nashville and ditched us so cold-heartedly. Surely no one like that ever worked in the sweat shop that we call the boiler room.

Whoever you may have been, you have been replaced by a new boiler room lackey who is most likely far cooler than you.

Shucks... we miss you, ok.

Did You Think I Forgot Ya'll?

Boiler Room is the New Sweat Shop

So, after 2 weeks of breaking the promise to continue blogging, the Nashville chapter of the boiler room would like to say HI!!!!

To show that I have been thinking of you all, here are a couple of tidbits:

FIRST: Mapquest has added an "Add a Stop" feature that I think Google Boy will find to be a good replacement for the oft-missed "Plan a Roadtrip" tool.

SECOND: This for all the VAL-gals - http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2006/07/06/AR2006070601678.html

I read this and thought of you.


THIRD: R-Cubed - I think I emailed you back, but since I am just using WebMail, I sometimes wonder who I have emailed, and who just received the "mind-draft" rather than an actual email. In case it's the former, and in case you don't have telepathy, I would like to say that the Seminar in Ethical Values courses are good because you do somewhat regular-person reading, rather than lawyer reading. You also go to a prof's house every week, and I think there is usually food involved. At least that's what I am banking on. Anyways, it's only a credit for the whole year, but who doesn't like to sit around, eat, and discuss real world issues with a bunch of law geeks? I mean, if that's not a boiler room boon, then what is? I have signed up for one (yes, by 11:59 p.m. last night). I wish you all luck with playing the LawReg Dice Game. It does not get easier, even when you know that you will probably get everything you want because you get to go first.

FOURTH: On my first day here, my boss asked me if I knew how to use WestLaw. The insult was 2-fold. (1). I am the LEXIS lady!!!!! and (2) He meant that word "Westlaw" to be generic for "can you do legal research?" Ouch. We've moved beyond that initial sting, and I quite like the job, but that first moment made me wonder if I would be crying for the Boiler Room every moment of this 6 weeks.

All right - That's it for now. Although, I do have one question for Google Boy - What's the deal w/Grad-Lev - are they going to give me suggestions on my other loans too? Cause I've got nothing!

notes from afar

The away team of the boiler room is enjoying time here in western maryland... there is actually a new member of the boiler room joining us, hoping to crank the temperature of the room up a few degrees.

Will she be able to replace our lost intern? Where will the new intern sit? Will the intern at the buffet move to the table in an attempt to create a rigid boiler room hierarchy? Only time will tell in such dramas.

stay tuned for updates....

quote of the day

from an attorney while discussing a case with 2 impressionable law student interns:

"we are not constrained by any ethical obligations."

lawyers without borders

Why stop with helping americans? or humans, for that matter?

One of our supervising attorneys will shortly be helping to mediate the human–elephant conflict (HEC) in sri lanka. (This is a conflict between humans and elephants, not a conflict involving elephants who are human.) Although much attention has been given to the other animal conflict in sri lanka (something about tigers?), amazingly little has been said about the elephants who are struggling against the human occupation.

Our attorney will be helping by measuring the dung of said elephants. Let us first say that we are extremely proud to be working with such a broad-minded, caring person, and we praise his initiative and sacrifice. You can't help but admire someone who chooses, for the sake of creature-kind, to measure dung during his hard-earned vacation.

But...what are we supposed to tell his clients during the month that he's away?? "Sorry, we can't help you with your Section 8 housing voucher because...?" Suggestions, let us know. We'll be brainstorming, too.

where did everyone go?

I thought we were supposed to be a hard and dedicated staff of people
willing to change the world regardless of the risks or pay. The boiler
room is surprisingly empty today - only one soul to hold the fort down
and fight the good fight for justice and the American way.

I'll just assume that everyone is out on assignment, scoring one for the
little guy.

Fearless Feline!

http://ktla.trb.com/news/ktla-catvsbear,0,1121780.story?coll=ktla-news-1

Re-shout out

Let's give a nice big re-shout out to our comfy chairs. Rescuing them
from the attic might be some of the best work we've done all summer.

Belated Shout-Out

Thanks to John Da Bomb Conover for the cookies on Friday!

um....

Mike, it’s not cool to write goodbye notes to yourself.

boy are we going to miss mike

a week without mike is like a week without hope and joy. we'll miss you!

Go Shorty, it's your birthday.

Happy Birthday to Mai-Linh!!

(gifts, food and/or straight-up ca$h will be accepted on behalf of Mai-Linh in the Boiler Room)

Updating the boiler room on world news, part II

See video, “Flushes Make for Courthouse Blush”:

http://www.cnn.com/LAW/

Quote of the day from the Boiler Room

 “Well, I just proved that I’m a man, and you’re Asian.”

We love you Melissa!

Yay M&M’s!

Let's tell lawyer jokes... I'll start

Warning Signs that you Might Need a Different Lawyer

 

- He tells you that his last good case was a Budweiser.

- When the prosecutors see who your lawyer is, they high-five each other.

- A prison guard is shaving your head.

 

Re: ensuring vocabularistic integrity

As it happens, this rule of grammar was instituted under the
totalitarian reign of Ancient Roman emperor Vocabularius, who would
invite people from as far as Cathay to his humble estate, known
simply as the "Vocabulum," at which point he would hold word-based
gladiator fights. The loser would be tied up in a burlap sack along
with a snake, a rat, and an angry cat, and then thrown off of a cliff
to the river below.

Vocabularius, though, would ensure the person had a proper burial.

Since we have our own dojo, I think we should also have our own t-shirt, too.

popcorn has saved the day

Popcorn, glorious popcorn! yes... such a fine whole grain morsel
(microwaved, no less) has renewed our interest in our work and led us to
feel loved back here in the boilerroom. If only Kelly could be here to
rejoice with us.

Ensuring vocabularistic integrity

There is a growing outcry against the interchangeable use of the verbs "insure" and "ensure." Here in the Boiler Room, we believe that under no circumstances should "to insure" be used to signify "to make certain." After all, you would never use "to ensure" to signify "to protect against loss or liability," would you? We urge you to join your voice to ours and help keep these words distinct!!!

we are lost without kelly....

we're like a ship without a rudder.... a car without a steering wheel....

Ok, enough of the sappy stuff. The extra room kicks ass!

If you mess with us, you are liable to get f---ed up.

This is the official dojo of the boiler room. Don't mess with us.

Our HERO

The power of communication has brought us fresh air - not the Go Home Early kind of fresh air, but the beautiful, enduring whirr of a fan!!! Thanks Tim...

countdown until the celebration!

One body out of the boilerroom at the end of the day! Hurrah!

(this post has nothing to do with our happiness or unhappiness about
Kelly's departure, only joy at the extra space!)

mai-linh rocks

we may not get paid back here, but at least we get free bagels!

Sharky's, Tomorrow, 5:00 sharp!

Sad as I am to leave, I am excited that Sharky's will the last stop on this wonder-ride of penniless labor. Thank goodness for the $1 brews.

who's feet smell?

It's getting a bit stinky in here!

uh oh.

http://www.nytimes.com/2006/06/17/technology/17wiki.html

Mai-Linh 1, Mike 0

She knows more about Chausser than he does.

quiet monday

What's the deal? No Kelly and we're all so quiet?

Alex isn't here - let's get this party started....

Party in Mike's hotel room tonight

Free Continental breakfast, too.

monday is inside out day

All employees must wear all of their clothes inside out on monday.

Chocolate Chip!!!

Yes... the Boiler Room hearts Liz right back. Come and get 'em!

re: quickie poll

If the boiler room had a soundtrack, what would it be?
Clearly “Hot in Here” by Nelly.
It’s gettin hot in here (so hot!) so take off all your clothes.

quickie poll

if the boiler room could speak, what would it say?

Perhaps "it's freaking hot in here"

Strike!

Big thumbs down to keeping the door closed. This calls for action! I say we take our comfy rolling chairs and roll ourselves right out that back door in protest! Who's with me?

poltergeist in the room?

a poltergeist closed and locked the "fire exit only" door - our only connection to the outside world - while I was out of the room for 30 seconds. have they continued to oppress us through supernatural means or am I just going crazy?

It's confirmed.

Liz is the only one that *hearts* us.

Poll

Raise your hand if you *heart* Vin Diesel.

 

The way they treat us around here,

it's like we're all the same anonymous person. Like if one of us says
something, it might as well come from any of us.

Mike...

...is one fine upstanding intern. The kind of guy you feel proud to work with. The kind of guy who shares his Chex Mix.

Thank you, Mike.

The reason i've gotten no work done in the past half hour

Gofugyourself.com sucked me in.

Q. Dear Aunt Fugly,

What does a girl wear to an annulment? Is Carolina Herrera too much? And, how much time should I wait before contacting my ex? He might be married, but I'm pretty sure that was just a revenge wedding because I married a gay alien and he wasn't happy about it. Maybe I should wear something seductive so I can go right over to his place after I sign the papers? I'm nervous! God, I need a rice grain.

You complete me,

Afraid of Carbs

A. Dear You Had Me At I DON'T CARE,

You know, you people don't have real problems. I have real problems. I'm having Alan Partridge's baby and no I'm not yes I am no I'm not yes I am WHERE IS MY HAMBURGER? I WILL THROW THIS MICROPHONE STAND AT YOUR HEAD. No, I won't. See? It's just a banana. Banana. BANANA! B-A-N-A-N-A-N-A-N-A-N-A-N-A -- that reminds me, I have to call Stefani. Talk about people who can't DRESS. She makes ME look like -- hey, remember when I dressed all classy and shit? Like when I was in that movie with that guy from Cheers. Man, he had the best weed. I should call him except I totally don't remember his name anymore.

I'm going to take a nap now.

 

oppressive work environment

The yelling of the attorneys is starting to become background noise it happens so much. Don't they know that we're just students and haven't yet learned the intricacies of the federal rules of civil procedure or the ins-and-outs of Title VII claims or how to make a proper cup of coffee?

They're way too quiet in that boiler room.

For those of you who are work-starved, bored, attention-deficit,
celebrity-obsessed, or into some pretty good schadenfreude:

www.gofugyourself.com

Like they do in Nevada

Today we learned about the Nevada legislature. They have an online gift shop that, let's face it, inspires envy in all of us.

I want to look into how difficult it would be to start our own gift shop. (It's a thought exercise, since I don't imagine there'd be much of a real-llife market.) We should consider selling:

1) 8 dark-brown heavy wooden chairs
2) half-used legal pads, cryptic notes included
3) our lunches
4) old but functioning nerf gun, 1 ball included
5) 1 old xerox copy machine (not sure if it works)
6) a couple of old bagels from the table in the waiting area
7) quite a large collection of attorneys' diplomas and licenses, already framed

and so forth. Any takers, contact us.

Keeping the boiler room up to date on important world news:  http://www.cnn.com/2006/US/06/15/naked.suitor.ap/index.html.

 

Word has it, Mike was in Ann Arbor yesterday.

New Printer

We're loving the fact that we can actually print again and don't have to
email everything to an attorney to print for us.

Until the new printer came in, I was thinking about filing a claim b/c
of the poor working conditions.

just a minute ago

Anonymous #1: It's really pleasant in here right now, temperature-wise.

Anonymous #2: It is.

It's Freaking Hot In Here

As usual, the boiler room is hot, hot, hot. But we are enjoying lounging on our cool, new, comfortable, ragtag assortment of office chairs.