Only a week and a half left kids. Keep up the good work! I imagine there will be a huge amount of teasing after the skit on Friday so we should probably spend most of the week at the pool. Since LAJC likes to make us feel guilty for frequenting places with 'unfair practices,' we should probably avoid this place:

http://www.google.com/hostednews/ap/article/ALeqM5iLSkiD_HEJq_JPFUxVKAdRWZjnpAD99E04QG0

P-AGRO complaints

At the risk of turning this blog into a forum for pagro (def: abbreviation for passive-aggressive) complaints......

I am noticing a trend of the lawyers suspiciously asking the interns to lunch when some of us are tied up with other work-related commitments.....

Since we are not on the Charlottesville lawyer email group, we can only assume this is a massive conspiracy.

What Qualifies as Too Short?

In other news - inspired partially by a conversation regarding proper swim attire for males who want to get a good workout and in part by the NBA finals - the boiler room debated whether it was time for a comeback of the short short [for men]. Arguments in favor - more freedom of movement, enhanced flexibility, greater opportunity to show of your athleticism. Arguments against were hard to come by - eventually it was brought up that tan lines were a serious issue, but one that would become less of an issue over time. Overall the consensus is it's time to bring back the short shorts. Not everyone has to be quite as dramatic as Chris Cooley - but we support the shifting paradigm.

Musical Chairs

While Kodiak and Slumlord Slayer were both smart enough to realize the first day that the hard wooden chairs that fill the boiler room were just not built for 8 hour days filled with saving the world, other heroes were not so far sighted, and the consequences were dire.

The fall-out started this morning, when Slumlord Slayer arrived to find Jubilee! sitting on the softly padded rolling chair, looking smug. Slumlord Slayer responded by borrowing Kodiak's chair. Kodiak took the de-throning well, but eventually the hard wooden seat got to her. She hunted the office until she found a better option. Meanwhile...our newest hero, Hello Kitty, took the orange computer chair.

It didn't take long for J.B. to want in on this padded chair action. Unfortunately, the chair he selected from the hallway had been booby trapped! After a valiant fight, he gave up. All was not lost, however. Kodiak again disappeared into the bowels of the office to locate a super-seat for our J.B. Now, there is only one iron-rumped hero in the boiler room who refuses to give up on his faithful old chair. May his brave bottom never blister!

Adventures

A handful members of the Boiler Room went to lunch at Saigon today with a handful of the real lawyers, and it got a bit crowded in the car. We solved the space problem by "slamming" the Director into the trunk. Please submit your suggested captions for the above photo in the comments area.


Our driver played some Leonard Cohen to liven up the mood. The windows steamed up. Footprints started showing up on the windows. Yes, footprints.


Yes I called my footprints all night
But they don't seem to care
The last time that I saw them
They were leafing through your hair

Footprints, footprints
Where are you now my footprints?

Starburst: Snack of Champions

We in the Boiler Room have discovered the secret to success: candy. Last week we had an nice mix of chewable and peanut-butter cups (which attracted the attention of our superiors). This week we've got a new batch and the starburst are packing an extra special fruity punch. As Jubilee! continues to track down insurance information and Kodiak wrestles with the Fourteenth Amendment - it's those little chewy fruity pieces of joy that keep us fighting the good fight. (Spinning class at 6:15 am for anyone interested in counterbalancing the ill effects of eating bit-size energy packs all day).

Ahoy Me Hearties

Aye Mateys. We pirates of the law gathered for our crew meetin' this morn, led by our fearless Captain Grey(in')-Beard. After settin' aside some admin issues, we prepared for t' comin' battles, and they be many. Battles with t' bilge-sucking wig-heads, t' corrupt yellow-belly officers o' the law, battles with them scalawag sick houses, and o' course, with the lily-livered merchant spawn. As our fearless captain said, "It's bullsh*t that they make sh*t up...we should f* with them a little." And f* with them we shall, t' get our clients thr booty, be it a letter o' apology or free ice-cream for life!"

Slumlords Beware

Members of the Boiler Room will not be held responsible for the death of a landlord. The one exception to this rule being those slumlords personally slayed by Slumlord Slayer. Furthermore, we should add that Slumlord Slayer much prefers the use of a longsword to that of a knife, gun, or other less noble weapons. Malevolent landlords, beware.

Because nothing says saving children like Dick...

Cheney that is. Today on Slate.com, Fred Kaplan posted a opinion column making several compelling arguments for sending Cheney back to the Bunker. Those of us here in the Boiler Room couldn't agree with Mr. Kaplan more.

Dick Cheney at Legal Aid Justice Center? Working with needy children in tough situations? Supervising the JustChildren Interns? What could be better? Not only would our former Vice President bring a wealth of knowledge about child rearing and discipline to the Bunker, but he would also bring his notably warm and pleasant demeanor, uplifting the spirits of all who work there and, I'm sure, more than a touch of energetic enthusiasm to the job. Obnoxious prosecutors might ease up on those nose-breakers if they knew that legal aid was preparing the Bunker for water-boarding exercises, and I'm sure clients would be more than honest with our former Vice President there to gently keep them on track. Watch out for leaks though, as we all know the consequences for dropping client information are much worse than those for letting slip the identities of certain CIA agents.

So, if you're reading this Mr. Cheney, please, listen to Mr. Kaplan and head on over to the Bunker. Those Just Children interns are waiting anxiously for you to "gently encourage" them to stay on track.

Send Cheney Back to the Bunker! - Fred Kaplan, Slate

Although the Bunker showed us up by being 'on time' to case review, they still haven't posted on their blog. I think that says it all.

We learned so much about our boss today:



and


All in all - good mtg. And there was cake.....

Life Lessons: Part 1

As we stumble through westlaw and lexis searches, try to recover from the shock that LRW actually was the most important class we took 1L year, and triumph over the intricacies of adding printers on both macs AND pcs, we are reminded that there are still a few tricks of the trade we have yet to learn.

Slumlord Slayer has quickly become an expert on all things housing related - but her valiant efforts to save housing for the poor were almost nullified when she was thrown a curve ball late yesterday afternoon: What is a roach?

For those who have yet to learn - we have attached an instructional video so that next time you will not be caught off guard.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1dtrIidmj2s

Day 2: It's hot in the Boiler Room

Welcome to summer 09 in the Boiler Room. Google Images has kindly provided us with a record of important events of the day. To start with a fine quote:

We also had a bit of this:

and this:

And, of course, this:

All this pretty much makes us:

What can we say? It's hot in the Boiler Room, or it would be if the AC was turned down just a touch...